“Why is it so hard to accept the party is over?” – a 12th Houser
I’ve probably listened to Drew Barrymore by SZA a thousand times, but this time, I heard it with the ears of an astrologer. When she said, “why is it so hard to accept the party is over?” I immediately said, “ugh, a 12th houser.” 🙄
But in a loving, compassionate way of course!! 😭🤗
Because while the song sounds like it was written by a 12th house Venus (by birth or by transit), as someone with Saturn—my chart ruler!—in the 12th house, babyyyy, I get it. I feel like I’ve spent a lifetime wondering the same thing.
Well, either that or “dear GOD when will this party end?”
12th house—or Pisces—energy is known for finding joy and a sense of freedom and liberation in “the party” being over and, tbh, getting to go home.
We usually love and can even crave the idea of endings and even escape; withdrawing ourselves and our energy from the duties and demands and illusory dynamics that come with participating in the material world and its pageantry. Even the so called “fun” parts.
Like, no offense but for a 12th houser or someone with prominent Pisces placements, a lot of times we can barely stay awake for all the bells and whistles and pomp and circumstance yall be going up for, let alone get excited for. Like I’m honestly so happy for you, but baby I’M BORED!
And it’s because 12th housers can have this inherent focus on the spiritual or ethereal side of life, feeling more connected and fulfilled by the “Other World” and the “unseen” and even their imaginations than anything this surface-level, material reality can offer.
But, while basking and immersing into the ethereal can grant them this utterly vivifying sense of inner peace—a real Piscean “party”—their inevitable exit from la-la land and return to the external world can feel absolutely immiserating. The 12th house is also the house of sorrows, after all.
As the last house of the zodiac, esoterically representing enlightenment and the last stop before transcendence, 12th housers can have a better capacity than most for understanding that “all good things come to an end,” and they’re usually pretty adept at making peace with that. Usually.
The literal poster children of “it is what it is.”
But baby, there are times—many a times, actually—when they get too attached, enmeshed & entangled in the external world of permanence and control and sensory pleasures, and those same spiritual truths they were just hooting and hollering about (in a soft, ethereal way of course) become almost impossible for them to accept.
And it usually happens when they seem to have found the kind of “party”—or person—that makes them feel like they can bring that eternal sense of bliss into their everyday lives (the 6th house). When they’ve started seeing their own lil slice of heaven in one of us mortals. When they feel like they’ve found something or somebody to serve as their “dream come true.” Young or immature 12th house or Pisces energy, particularly, and especially when it comes to relationships.
They can gradually stop leaning on their connection to “the unseen” and the meditative or artistic practices that help them find that inner peace, and slowly start looking to those external connections to provide a portal for some sweet, sweet escapism. They can start projecting what should be an inner and spiritual search for peace, love and understanding onto something or someone external, temporal and temporary who couldn’t possibly provide all that.
And one thing about that 12th house—co-ruled ruled by Jupiter, the eternal optimist, and Neptune, the delulu queen—hope aboundsssss honey. They have hope in ABUNDANCE! Head all in the clouds, stars all in their eyes!
Even when all the cake been ate and the balloons done deflated, they can still find themselves on the dance floor, keeping up that same old tired two step, waiting for their dream dance partner to sweep them off their feet. While a more realistic kinda person might “get a grip” and realize their “dream” person left with somebody else like 6 hours ago, they just refuse to face the music.
Hope is a beautiful thing but 12th housers can be hopeaholics and it will have them staying in situations, locations or mindsets wayyyyy longer than they should. It’s like their connection to the “Other World” fills them with these beautiful visions of how life has the potential to be, and they can have a really hard time coping when reality doesn’t meet the potential.
Even if the potential does still exist, but perhaps conditions aren’t quite ripe for them to manifest in the material just yet, they’ll literally be like, “I’ll wait.”
They can simply refuse to accept “the party is over.”
But alas, they must. They have to recognize that dreams really do be getting deferred, or sometimes they just light up the sky for a second and then…die. That doesn’t mean they aren’t valuable or don’t deserve to see the light of day. Things that come from the “Other World” can be tricky and tough to pin down in a way that makes sense for this material reality. And you mustn’t put that pressure on yourself to make it happen, or expect others who can’t see the vision to oblige. It is quite literally above you now.
But you know what you can do when it seems like the magic you believed in so much—or the relationships you believed in so much—refuse to manifest?
One, accept them for what they are and for what they aren’t, but find the beauty and the magic and the meaning in them regardless.
Enjoy them while they last and once they start to crumble under the weight of reality, just gon’ head and let them go.
Two, get the joy of externalizing them not by projecting them onto someone else or a situation that’s beyond your control, but by embodying them your damn self.
Be inspired by them.
Learn from them and let them lead you to the next phase of your quest toward inner peace.
TURN THEM INTO ART AND AMAZING ASS SONGS.
Meditation, art, therapy, art, travel, philosophical study and even finding some spritely elderly friends (or just old souls) to go on walks with. And did I mention art?
